You're probably always the douchebag to somebody.

This beautiful country of ours is founded on the principle of individuality and freedom.  We are a nation that proudly boasts of such a diverse culture that welcomes innovative thinking and progressive thoughts.  As a new generation begins to blossom, we seem to be simply diluting our individuality and freedoms by evolving into culture more interested in coddling and encouraging.  We have evolved from a society that pushed kids to try to win a first place trophy and instead give every kid a trophy because they all tried.  Really?  We are raising our children to believe that is okay to just try, and you will be rewarded.  As long as you put forth an effort, you get a trophy.  This is not a healthy mentality.  You get a reward for busting your ass and being the best at something.  Sure, encouragement is fine and dandy but it ends with simple encouragement.  As a parent, you can tell your kids they did a good job and boost their ego a little bit, but do not sit there and say everyone is a winner.  This is a false reality which will probably boost business for psychiatrists in the future because there are going to be tons of adults in therapy trying to figure out why they are not getting jobs or raises even though they really tried their best.  You know what, sometimes your best isn’t good enough.  Sometimes, somebody else’s best is just better than yours.  Deal with it.

This rant really came about because of an incident that occurred with social media and the Penn State molestation scandal.  Ashton Kutcher posted a tweet after Joe Paterno was fired.  The tweet stated, “How do your fire Jo Pa? #insult #noclass as a hawkeye fan I find it in poor taste.”  The tweet was more or less referring to how the university let the legendary coach go from his position.  People are divided heavily over this whole ordeal.  There are those that believe Paterno deserve the firing because he did not do enough to handle the situation.  The other side of the fence believes that Paterno reported his knowledge to the head of campus police and left it in the hands of campus police and the university.  I am not going to really go into discussion over who is right and wrong because a) I am not educated enough on the issue to determine that, and b) it is irrelevant to the point of my article.  I am more concerned over Kutcher’s backtracking after this tweet caused an uproar amongst his followers.  Kutcher apologized and is now turning his twitter account over to a management company to ensure he doesn’t make an ill-advised tweet again.  C’mon Ashton.  You make one mistake and it hurts your image a little bit so you turn over your “personal thoughts” over to a bunch of PR drones.  Man up.  We are a nation of convenience where integrity and individuality no longer matter.  Social media has made this society instant.  Everything is reported in the now, much like the way we speak on day-to-day basis.  Everyone has had those moments where we open our mouths and instantly know we should not have said that.  Social media has made those outbursts public and even more permanent.  Don’t be afraid of what you post, because, in fact, when you are typing those words, you probably mean it.  Modern society says that if a lot of people don’t like it, you should apologize for your rash and inconsiderate thoughts in order to improve your image.  It is turning us into a nation of politicians.  And EVERYONE loves politicians!  Every aspect of our lives is so political now.  School, work, athletics, entertainment, etc.  We are afraid to be offended.  Grow up.  That is such a childish way of thinking.  Do you think the founding fathers were sitting around debating over whether to create our nation and someone stood up and said, “You know, those guys across the pond might not really like this idea.  We will probably piss off the Brits and hurt their feelings because we don’t want to be a part of their country any more.”  Doubtful.  We are soft.  Our children are being raised soft.  We are being told to express ourselves BUT don’t do it if it’s going to offend anyone.  Huh?  Sure, that works in certain situations, but ultimately there are going to be issues where you speak your mind and people are going to get pissed off.  That’s human nature and that is never changing.

We need to stop being so sensitive.  Everybody in this country is so fake now.  We are now the country that teaches everyone to be polite and cordial in public and then go behind people’s backs to throw our insults around.  Perfectly healthy lifestyle.  It’s okay though, I’m sure they’ll make a pill to fix all of this in a few years.

People shine the light to direct you.  But you insist on walking blind.

Darkness absorbs you.

It starts spreading and eventually consumes.  Darkness within.

A once illuminated road has been crumbled.  Rebuilding is never easy.

Why would you rebuild on shaky grounds?

There is no reason when you choose your handicap.

Choice evolves to need.

Need causes destruction.

Open your eyes.  See the ruins.  Choose to see.

You will see those waiting to pick up the pieces.

Those who hold your hand in the darkness run and hide.

Cowards.

Soulless creatures who feed on the vulnerable.

Open your eyes.

Make this darkness a mere blink.

Not a permanent close.

Speak softly and carry a big stick (wink wink)

Throughout my life I have learned many lessons and will continue to learn until the day I die.  Every human walking this earth experiences personal evolution on a second to second basis.  This cycle only ends when one stops breathing.  Any lesson I’ve learned growing up, I apply to my professional career.  Being a political science major, I have studied many leaders throughout history.  One of the most interesting and phenomenal people ever to grace this earth, in my opinion, was Theodore “Teddy” Roosevelt.  He was a brilliant president and provided many quotes to live by both professionally and personally.

“There are two things that I want you to make up your minds to: first, that you are going to have a good time as long as you live – I have no use for the sour-faced man – and next, that you are going to do something worthwhile, that you are going to work hard and do the things you set out to do.”

This quote sticks out in my mind and is what I base my existence upon.  If everyone followed these words of wisdom, this world would be a much better place.  Look at the first statement.  Why would anyone not want to have a good time as long as you live.  Live every day as if nothing is going to go wrong.  Inevitably, things are going to go wrong from time to time, but how you handle these speed bumps define you as a person.  Misfortune occurs on a daily basis, but take it with stride and walk with a smile on your face.  The second statement focuses on legacy.  Do something worthwhile.  If you are not doing something deemed important, at least make it worth your own while.  If you are going to do something, do it to the fullest.  Set goals and accomplish them.  From the simplest of tasks to world peace, set out to do something and with every ounce of energy you have, strive to succeed.  Thoughts of failure only place destiny and failure that much closer.

“Let us speak courteously, deal fairly, and keep ourselves armed and ready.”

I believe this quote would be my business mantra.  First and foremost, every person I meet, I treat with respect and kindness.  Every situation can be handled with kindness.  People who want to be rude or nasty cannot stand it when someone is constantly nice to them.  Every situation should be handled consistently with fairness.  Whether an employee has been with a company for five days or five years, all situations must be dealt with equally.  Finally, you must always remained armed.  Never drop your guard.  Regardless of how nice or fair you may handle something, be ready and prepared to stand strong on the stance.  Do not let someone catch you off guard.  Failure starts with failure to prepare.

“No man can lead a public career really worth leading, no man can act with rugged independence in serious crises, nor strike at great abuses, nor afford to make powerful and unscrupulous foes, if he is himself vulnerable in his private character.”

What you do behind the scenes makes up who you are as a person.  No matter what image you portray to the public, your personal image with protrude.  People can only act in a role for so long before they reveal their true self.  If you have private vulnerabilities, people will inevitably find them and use them to their advantage.  Be proud of yourself and be the same person at work as you are at home.  For some people, this will require an evaluation of their true self.

“Don’t hit at all if you can help it; don’t hit a man if you can possibly avoid it; but if you do hit him, put him to sleep.”

This is an amazing quote for business.  Never take jabs at people.  It is completely unnecessary to take shots at people for no reason.  But once a punch is thrown, the gloves come off.  Go for the kill.  You can be smart about a situation and resolve the issue without any major conflict, but if the opponent wants to battle, do not leave any room for retaliation.  They might start the pettiness but it’s up to you to end it quickly.

“No man is above the law and no man is below it; nor do we ask any man’s permission when we require him to obey it.”

We are all equals in this world.  We all live by the same rules.  Some people think they do not, but their ignorance will catch up with them.  We all obey these laws and principles out of respect for mankind.  Some things are resolute and require no questioning.

“It is true of the Nation, as of the individual, that the greatest doer must also be a great dreamer.”

All great things are based upon dreams.  If you have a dream, pursue it.  Most great thinkers are viewed as extravagant or over the top.  Don’t be afraid to go out on a limb.

"Ummm, yeah, I really like to do laundry. That's why I have 74 bottles of detergent."

Pop culture strikes again.  I feel like I am living in the movie Idiocracy. (Stupid movie, genius plot)  We are a constantly devolving nation.  Everyone around me seems to be getting lazier and stupider every day, which in turn, is probably making me stupider with every passing moment.  People can take a genius idea and turn the implementation into a circus sideshow.  I’m sure most of you have heard of “extreme couponing.”  (Say that in the voice of the guys from Harold & Kumar and you get a much better effect)  This is a great idea in theory.  The idea of getting $3000 worth of groceries for like $39 is almost unbelievable.  I probably spend about $400-$500 a month on groceries so if I could get all of that for about $10, I’d be pumped.  This is where the genius of the concept goes out the window.  You might ask, how could this go wrong.  Have you seen some of these extreme couponer’s shopping lists?  Unreal.  I understand having some back-ups of certain items.  It’s never a bad idea to have an extra package of toilet paper or a back-up toothpaste.  Hell, I’m not opposed to having a couple of back-ups of everything you regularly use.  I draw the line at having 40 cases of toilet paper and 160 bottles of Clorox wipes.  Unless you run a cleaning company, why would you ever need this?  That being said, if you are using this coupon madness for your business, you can safely remove yourself from the moronic everyday joe buying exorbitant amounts of products just because they can.

I noticed a common theme amongst these “bargain” shoppers.  They all seem to have stockpile rooms that look as if they are opening up a grocery store in their homes.  If I have to dedicate more than a pantry to all of my groceries, I probably have way too much food/products on my hands.  Then again, maybe all of these extreme couponers know a little more than the rest of us.  They probably know about the looming zombie apocalypse and are simply masking their preparations by passing the stockpiling off as simple smart shopping.  In that case, I commend you “extreme coupononers” for being smarter than the average bear.

Aside from business use, this extreme couponing can be used for good.  While I firmly believe most of these people are simply hoarders, many organizations could use this phenomenon for good.  There are so many Americans who do not have the means to get their own groceries.  If there are people who have perfected the art form of buying thousands of dollars worth of groceries for next to nothing, why are we not helping those in need?  It’s probably the cynic in me but I believe that most people are extremely selfish and do not think about others.  I read an article about a woman named Rhonda Smith who helped to use her skill to benefit others.  She started an organization called Save It Forward which teaches people about extreme couponing and how to use it to help families in need.  GENIUS!  Thank you Rhonda Smith and others who have taken the opportunity to not only benefit themselves but lend a helping hand.

If you need that many Mentos, you have a bigger problem than hoarding.

While this craze has been used for good, I am still opposed to most of the people highlighted on “The Learning Channel”.  (PS, TLC is another rant completely.  What happened to this channel???)  They have a mental problem much like those featured on Hoarders.  Buying things just because you can and stockpiling them is a mental disease.  Granted, they are not hoarding hundreds of cats or hanging on to every newspaper they’ve received since 1975, they are still collecting hundreds of unnecessary items.  Use your “powers” for good people.  Stop being morons.

If Michael Vick had done the same things to a person that he did to these dogs, he would be headed for the electric chair.  I am not advocating that Vick should be sentenced to death, but I do believe he has gotten off fairly easy.  Yes, he served his time in prison and rightfully so.  Part of his probation is that he cannot own a dog until 2012.  This provision should be extended indefinitely.  Vick has completely lost the right to own a pet, much less a dog.  He is claiming that his family misses having a dog and that his daughters want a dog.  He needs to look his daughters in the face and tell them why they can never have a dog in their household.  If simply describing the actions that prevent the Vick family from owning a dog are not enough for his children to understand, they need to be shown the pictures of the poor dogs that were mutilated.  They need to know what kind of monster their father was to these innocent creatures.  His daughters need to know how many dogs were killed at the hands of their father and his friends.  He needs to tell his daughters that he raised these dogs to destroy each other so his buddies could gamble and be entertained.  I’m sure being filthy rich and playing a sport for a living is so difficult that there is nothing remotely entertaining enough to pass the time.

Many people are saying that Vick needs a second chance.  Sure, he can have a second chance at life.  He has been released from prison and is living on his own now.  He was allowed back in the NFL so he can make a ridiculous salary that most people will never see in a lifetime.  But, he does not need to be given a second chance at owning a dog.  Would you let a pedophile work in a school your child is attending?  I don’t think so.  Would you let Michael Vick dogsit your pitbull while you go on vacation?  If you say yes, you should never be allowed to own a dog either.  He has forfeited every right to ever own a dog ever again.  Pedophiles and murders have serious mental issues and the same goes for any individual who would put two animals in a cage to fight to the death.  If you claim that Michael Vick is a sane individual, I question your own sanity.  Michael Vick does not ever deserve to own a dog or any animal for that matter.  His children must suffer for the things that their father has done.  They can own a dog when they move out and are living on their own.

Some people want to argue that dog fighting is the least of an animal lovers concerns with all of the issues that arise from the meat that we eat.  Sure, there are plenty of things that are wrong about the treatment of animals when it comes to slaughterhouses and chicken mills that raise animals to be killed for consumption.  First, dogs are pets that are not eaten in this country.  Yes, a cow breathes and walks around just as much as any dog, but dogs and cats are domesticated creatures that families own for companionship.  We raise these animals because we care for them.  My dogs are my children.  When I have had to put my dogs to sleep, I felt like I had lost a family member.  I did not just move on the next day and buy another dog.  There will always be a void in my heart for the pets I have lost.  Killing my dog is the same as killing a family member.  Dogs are defenseless.  They depend on their owners to provide the essentials of life.  Needless to say, the treatment of animals raised for consumption is not comparable and is a completely separate issue.

Every person is deserving of a second chance but every action in life comes with consequences.  Sometimes these actions have consequences that limit particular aspects of your second chance at life.  Michael Vick messed up.  He is free from prison and allowed play in the NFL.  Those two things alone are more than he should have ever been given.  Playing in the NFL is a privilege.  Sure, there are players who have done illegal things and are allowed to play.  Michael Vick is pushing the limits of his second chance by saying that he wants to own a dog.  Do you think that someone who sold thousands of pills on the street and had an addiction to those pill s themselves should be allowed to work at a pharmacy or in a hospital with access to medication after they serve their prison term?  Of course not.  They should probably look for a different job.  Sure they, can work again but not with the very things that got them in trouble in the first place.  He should NEVER be allowed to own another dog in his life.  He should never be allowed to be around a dog without proper supervision.  He gave up his right to own a dog FOREVER.  Go buy a goldfish, at least they won’t remember having to kill another goldfish when you raise them to fight.  Vick will always be a monster for the crimes he committed.

Feeding the masses!

“If you don’t have any haters, you’re doing something wrong.”  I’ve heard this quote so many times it makes my ears bleed.  This quote could not be further from the truth.  Let me preface my argument with the fact that, inevitably, someone is going to dislike whatever you are doing.  Thus, there will be a small faction of people that hate everything.  This is a guarantee in life just the same as death and taxes (unless you are a bum, See previous article).

So my first qualm with this statement is the fact that there is a hater for everything.  Therefore, if this statement holds true, everyone in this world is doing things right because there is a hater for everything.  Right?  Let me start you with a list of things and/or people that have done or are doing things wrong; Kim Jong Il, the Ku Klux Klan, politics of any sort, Soulja Boy, HD DVD, suicide bombers, OJ Simpson, PETA, all of N’SYNC minus Justin Timberlake, and any VH1 reality show.  You may disagree and think some of things that I mentioned are/were perfectly fine, therefore you are a hater, which makes me right.  It does not matter what you create, someone is going to hate it.

Super Hater

My second issue with this mantra is that promotes hatred.  This ideology promotes creating a product or belief that some people will like and some people will hate.  If you do not create something that some people will hate, you are doing things wrong.  Why would you want to do that?  I don’t think that an auto manufacturer sits down at the planning table and says, “OK guys.  I am starting POS Motors and we are only going to make hybrid minivans so there will always be people who do not like our product.”  Why do car manufacturers make coupes, sedans, SUVS, & minivans?  Because, ultimately someone is going to dislike a coupe.  You plan to please the masses, not alienate customers.

My point is that you do not have to have haters to be doing something right.  If you set out with this mentality, you’re an idiot.  Hitler had an entire army full of haters.  Were they doing things right?

Silly lady, cups are for drinks.

I really wish this blog was about the infamous Tom Green hit, “The Bum Bum Song,” but sadly it is not.  This article is about the rampant amount of bums/panhandlers that I deal with on a rather consistent basis now.  I work inside of an entertainment district with multiple restaurants and bars which maintains a steady flow of business.  A bulk of our business comes from out-of-town guests that are looking for somewhere to enjoy a meal and/or have a few adult beverages.  Many of these guests are staying in nearby hotels and walk a short distance to our district.  In my personal opinion, there is nothing worse than walking down the street and being harassed several times for change by these pitiful excuses for human beings.  I am not referring to homeless people.  There is a difference.  I guarantee that most of the people you see on the street either are not homeless or have no desire to get off of the streets.  I feel no sympathy for these people.  If you do not want to get a job and try to make something of yourself, fine.  Do not bother me while I am walking down the street.  Stay quiet to yourself, scrounge through some trash cans, and enjoy the lifestyle you wish to live.

A sucker is born every day.

It is not like I see different bums and think all of these people are frauds.  I see the same bums every week.  They wander the streets and bother every guest walking down the street.   The city seems to do nothing about this.  If the city does not view this as a major problem, they are sorely mistaken.  Bums are more of an eyesore than decrepit buildings or trash on the street.  Those things are cosmetic and can be fixed.  Bums are a nuisance.  They harass citizens and visitors all while destroying the positive and bustling social environment we are trying to create in our downtown.  Our city just invested millions and millions of dollars in a downtown arena that has already brought new businesses and extra income to the city.  If we want to maintain and continue to develop our downtown as a major metropolitan area, we must eliminate this growing problem.  Yes, big cities have issues with bums but there are ways of fixing this.  What do most bums ask for?  Money.  (Change if you want to be exact, but there are the rather ambitious bums who ask for $5)  Most of these people deliver the same back story every time they ask for it.  My car broke down by the interstate and I just need some money to get gas.  Man, I just need a little bit of cash to get a bus ticket.  What they are really saying is “I need to go get a 40 from the gas station,” or “I could really use some new Jordans, so I’m going to go act homeless to elicit sympathy out of suckers.”  Most of this problem is lack of education.  The city of Louisville needs to be educated on how to get rid of bums.  First, do not give them money.  Do not believe any stories they tell you and feel no sympathy for these people.  I guarantee if you offer to buy them a sandwich instead of giving them $1, they will decline the offer.  If you offer to give them a ride, which I do not advise, they will simply tell you no because money is the only thing beneficial to any of them.  DO NOT GIVE THEM MONEY!  Bums are like a horde of zombies or starving pack of dogs.  If you show vulnerability and give in to their terrorist demands, they will come back… with friends.  It reminds of the South Park episode, “Night of the Living Homeless.”  If you haven’t seen how bad a community can really get with bums, watch this educational video.

Brightly colored parking meters are being used in high panhandling areas of San Francisco to eliminate problems and donate to charities

If you really want to help homeless people, donate some clothes to the mission or volunteer at the soup kitchen.  Send some money to your local homeless shelter.  I’ve heard that some cities have meters set up, much like parking meters, that are designed as a depository for donations to homeless shelters.  Rather than give the bums money, show the bum that you are giving money to help them out and point them in the direction of a place that can help them.  This not only deters the homeless imposters but shows them that you are caring enough to help others out.  You do not feel any guilt, which is what most bums prey upon, and you have done a good deed.  It is a win/win situation.

If the people  and the city actually make a conscious effort to ignore these pests to society, we can eliminate the problem.  Otherwise, hopes and dreams of making downtown a livable and inviting place to eat, shop, and spend an evening are pointless.  Who really wants to be asked for change and a cigarette three times during their meal on the patio?

Or we could just herd the panhandlers, stick them in a bus and send them to New Jersey.  I’m fine either way.

The Caveman and his mindless "wives"

Most of my rants come from watching television.  I can’t help it.  I’m addicted.  Anyhow, this rant stems from watching a couple episodes of “Sister Wives”.  My fiancee was watching and I happened to get sucked in.  Basically, the show is about a man who is married to three different women, has something like 13 children spread amongst the three wives, and is currently “courting” another woman.  The wives refer to the other wives as sister wives, hence the title.  This show evoked so much rage it all came boiling out.  I cannot believe people live like this.  I know that people should not be judgmental of others, but judging is human nature and I am simply stating my beliefs on the issue.  Everyone is entitled to their own opinion so if you disagree, let me know because I enjoy a heated debate.

First of all, I can’t believe that womens’ rights groups are not all over this.  Polygamy is morally degrading to any woman who takes part in it.  I don’t think I’ve ever come across a case where a woman is married to multiple men.  Why is it okay for a man to take as many wives as he chooses?  Any woman who enters into a polygamist relationship has absolutely no self confidence.  A woman who knowingly allows her husband to share a bond with many other women does not value herself.  She looks for the flaws in the other wives to console her own personal insecurities.  Any self respecting woman would want to settle down and have her husband all to herself.  What are the meaning of the vows that you take in a polygamist relationship?  Everything that the man promises to his wife is broken the second he places attention upon one of the other wives.  A man cannot satisfy the needs (get your mind out of the gutter) of multiple wives.  Women are extremely complex emotional beings, which are difficult enough to understand when you focus on one.  Polygamist wives are taking the easy way out.  Saying that you grew up in the lifestyle is not an excuse.  Polygamy is the easy way out.  Sure, it’s nice to live with three other women because Woman A likes to clean the house, Woman B loves to cook, and Woman C enjoys doing yardwork.  Ahhhhh, that’s three daily tasks off my plate, I’ll take handling the bills.  Really? Grow up and take some responsibility.  Sure there is more responsibility to be taken when you have 13 kids living in the house as well, but oh wait.  That’s right, Mr. Perfect wanted to have 6 kids with A, 6 kids with B, and 1 with C because he loves children.  WHAT????  First of all, in today’s economy, 6 kids is crazy.  Much less, 6 kids with 2 women and one with another.  You people bring these burdens upon yourself.  Don’t cry on TV about it.

On the show, the husband is “courting” another woman.  First off, if I hear the word “courting” again I am going to explode.  It is no longer 1868.  We can say dating or something relevant to the 21st century.  They bring this idea up with all the children and everyone is super excited.  The wives are anxious.  But then, the stories begin to change a little bit.  Words like jealousy start to pop up.  Really, you’re going to be jealous now that he is thinking about a fourth wife, but the extra two he already has doesn’t make you jealous?   These people are crazy.  I love my fiancee with all my heart and I want her to be the only person in this world to ever receive that love.  I will focus all my energy into making sure that she knows that.  How can one man truly love 3 or 4 women?  He doesn’t.  He loves sleeping with multiple women.  He loves being able to get away from the one that is nagging him or getting on his nerves this week.  There may only be one type of person lazier than a polygamist wife.  A polygamist husband.  Sure, he may have to work to provide for all of them but work is easy.  Displaying undying love and affection is the hard part.  Get over your caveman ego and live in the real world like the rest of us.

I do not know anyone who practices polygamy and that may be for the little fact that it is illegal in all 50 states but I know enough about monogamist relationships to place judgment on a polygamist lifestyle.  For anyone involved in polygamy, get some self respect.

No tip and you get to clean that up!

Ladies and gentlemen, I am a member of the service industry.  My job is to make sure everyone else has a great time within my establishment.  That being said, there are going to be issues that come up on occasion where you may not have a necessarily great time.  I, myself, have been victim of such instances in my own leisure time.  Being a manager in the industry, I tend to view certain things a little more sympathetically, but I also tend to look at everything with a different perspective when I am enjoying a meal with my fiancée.

I went out for lunch the other day at restaurant we frequently visit.  We have never had a bad experience at the place.  We were greeted very genuinely at the door and taken to our table outside.  The hostess asked us for our drink order, which saved the server a little bit of time.  The server then came up immediately after the hostess left and proceeded to ask us for our drink order.  I replied that the hostess had already taken our drink order.  Rather than simply smile and ask us if we needed anything else, she simply stated, “Who took your order,” with a rather nasty attitude.  And then proceeded to storm back inside the restaurant.  We looked past this and about 10 minutes later, she returned to take our order.  Then another 10-15 minutes later she checks back to ask us what we ordered.  Our appetizer finally shows up  after being shown to two other tables (I assume that she rang the order in on the wrong table) and then she checks back AGAIN to ask us what we ordered.  That’s three times now that she has taken our order.  I am watching her other tables and this seems to be a running pattern.  Another server walked by one of her other tables and saw a look of concern.  He asked them if there was anything that he could do for them and their response was priceless causing me to laugh out loud.  The girl at the table simply replied, “Yeah, can you get us another server?”  The server was a little speechless and said, “Of course. I’ll go get the manager as well.”  They asked him for a to go box because they did not even want to eat the food at the restaurant while she was serving them.  He comped their meal.  I was not expecting this for our meal, since everything came out delicious and in decent time.  Aside from the terrible server, everything else was great.  That story kind of brings me to this point; if your job is to “serve” others, at least fake some courtesy and happiness.  Servers have this mentality that a tip is guaranteed.  Even if you are a sub par server, then, yes a tip should be expected.  But, if you are terrible at your job, then, no, you do not deserve a tip.  I do realize that servers only make $2.13/hr whereas some other customers may not.  I generously take care of good servers.  I will even leave a 18-20% for an average server.  But I will NOT leave a good tip for a terrible server.  For instance, this server received a $1 tip, just so she just is aware that we were leaving her exactly the gratuity she deserved.  If a major league baseball player is not playing up to their salary potential, they are demoted to AAA and take a pay cut.  Make an effort and you will be rewarded, but do not assume that because you are a server that you should get a certain percentage of the bill as a tip.  My whole problem with our server was that she showed a weakness.  She had a terrible attitude the entire meal but when it was time to present the bill, she apologized for the terrible service and said she was having such a bad day.  I DON’T CARE!  Serving me is your job and at least fake a smile.  People choose to go to a restaurant to relax and enjoy a nice meal with no hassle.  In essence, a server has a very simple (and stressful) job with lots of moving parts.  If the kitchen messes up my order, it’s not the server’s fault.  Their tip should not be affected.  If they forgot what I ordered, fine.  Just check back quickly as soon as you realize you forgot.  (Our sever wrote our order down, so I don’t even know why she could not figure it out)

Tip #1. SMILE!

Here are a few tips for servers if you want to leave every table happy:

1. Smile. You are there to make someone’s dining experience enjoyable.  If you are having a good time at work, they are going to have a great time!

2. Be proactive.  Have app plates ready before the app comes out.  If the water is running low, grab everyone refills.

3.  Check back frequently.  Don’t harass the table, but make sure you check on them often.  You don’t even have to say anything.  Simply glance at the table as you are dropping something off at another table.

4.  Never let a table see you stressed.  This looks terrible.  It leads a table to believe that you do not know what you are doing.  Suck it up and deal with your stress on a break or after your shift.

Please generously tip deserving servers, they depend on this money.  18-20% is a fair number.  If a server exceeds expectations, overtip.  You will make their day.  Adding that extra $3 may seem fairly insignificant, but if every table added that extra money, a great server would be well taken care of.

He can thank his ignorant parents when he has a heart problem at 14.

First of all, let me say that this article is probably going to offend some people.  Now that that is out of the way, let me talk to you about something that really grinds my gears, fat people.  And I am not referring to someone who has a glandular problem or some medical issues.  I have no issues with uncontrollable factors nor do I have anything against people who are overweight.  I am referring to the general lazy American who sits around all day eating McDonald’s and watching television.  The person who makes no attempt to do any type of physical activity is more of my target.  I do not have any poll results or anything to factually back up any of my statements but I am willing to put money down that the United States is by far the fattest country in the world.  And, and I am willing to double down (not a reference to the KFC “sandwich”) that we are the fattest nation by a wide (pun intended) margin.  It is absolutely disgusting that we are allowing this to happen.  Sure, you can order a salad at McDonald’s now, but is that really consciously trying to become a healthier person?

PLEASE MAKE HER EXERCISE!

The problem with America is that we are a nation of convenience.  The easiest and quickest thing is the best thing.  We are the fattest nation because we are a LAZY nation.  I have to admit, I am a rather lazy person.  But, I know if I weighed about 250lbs, my ass would be in the gym and avoiding fast food.  The first reason is because I am somewhat concerned about my personal well-being.  Being 5’6″ tall and over 200lbs is not healthy.  There are so many complications caused from being obese.  According to the Center for Disease Control & Prevention, the number one leading cause of death in the United States is heart disease.  Being overweight can lead to high cholesterol, high blood pressure, diabetes, and an increased risk of coronary artery disease.   All of these are major risk factors of heart disease.  Why on earth would someone who is overweight continue to live an unhealthy lifestyle knowing that they are only slowly killing themselves?  My second reason for not becoming overweight is that I care about my personal appearance.  I, personally, do not find extra weight attractive.  I do not condone looking like a toothpick, runway model, but there is nothing attractive about muffin tops, cellulite, thunder thighs, saddle bags, or any other type of bodily reference that comes with obesity.

I feel like America is beginning to accept the fact that it is becoming a fat nation.  This disgusts me.  We see tons of “plus size” models everywhere.  Yes, people should embrace their bodies and feel that they are beautiful, but if you are not trying to get your body into the best possible shape it can be in, you are simply failing yourself.  Settling for being overweight and beautiful is simply laziness.  PS, overweight is not a subjective idea.  It is a very tangible number.  If your body mass index (BMI) is over 25, you are overweight.  I would assume most of these plus-size models fall in that category.  You are a MODEL.  Do your job and get in the gym.  Plus-size model is an oxymoron.  An average American may be overweight, but a model should not.  You get paid to be beautiful.  What is beautiful about fat?  NOTHING.

The point of my rant is that America is creating a poor image of itself and we are doing nothing to stop it.  We a nation of enablers.  When obesity is at an all time high, we should all, as individuals, make a conscious effort to better our health.  If you are overweight, skip the fast food drive-thru.  If you can’t walk up two flights of stairs without gasping for air, maybe spend a few minutes on the treadmill.  Better yourself.  This generation may be one of the first generations in a long time that is not expected to have a longer life expectancy than its predecessor and it is mainly based on the fact that we are not taking care of ourselves.  Get off your lazy asses and DO SOMETHING ACTIVE!  Oh, and anyone who allows their child to get as large as the kid in the picture above and continues to allow them to eat fast food, should be put in prison.  You are killing your child before they ever have a chance to live their life.  You are creating problems that will linger forever with that child.  I will leave you on this note… Ordering a Large Big Mac Value Meal and then getting a Diet Coke is not helping you out.  Just sayin’…